A Little Bit Of Mom

Today is Mother's Day.

This is my third.

I cannot even express in words how much joy my little girls have given me.

I cannot imagine living a life without them.

I have been blessed.

I have been blessed with a truly AMAZING mom.

A mom who showed me how to love.

Showed me how to care.

She showed me how to give

and how to open my heart and not judge.

She is a true role model.

A mom to many.

A light in a dark room.

She is full of joy.

She looks at life through the eyes of a child.

She is not afraid to follow her dreams.

Even if they fail

and in the end, she has nothing.

She is not afraid to step out of the mold.

To be different.

She is a friend to everyone.

She is not afraid to befriend a stranger.

Or be a friend to someone that others would never even take a glance at.

She loves.

One of my most treasured moments

from growing up

was the many late nights with her.

She would wake up at 1am, 2am, 3am.

She would make the most scrumptious snacks,

some would call them meals.

I would wake up and she would invite me out to sit with her

and eat while talking and laughing

or watching a show.

No matter what time it was,

she didn't care that I had to go to school the next morning.

Instead, 

she would open her arms

and let me stay up with her until we were so tired.

I only hope that I can be as much of a blessing to my children

as my mom has been to me.

I have grown up knowing I will be a mother someday.

I have never once thought

"I do not want kids"

God gave me a heart for children.

and whether I had them biologically,

or I adopted,

I knew

I was going to be a mom when I grew up.

Now,

I am blessed with 2 little girls.

Maybe we will have more.

Maybe we won't.

Maybe we will adopt.

Who knows.

But right now,

I know that I have 2 little girls that I want to pour everything

I possibly can into them.

I want to show them the love of God.

I want to show them the qualities of God that only women have.

I want to build them up.

I want them to know that they are loved.

Not just by me,

but by their daddy.

Their grandparents.

Their aunts & uncles

and friends.

But most importantly,

by God.

Being a mom is not easy.

It is the hardest thing I have ever done.

But I would never take it back.

Not even for a second.

My girls are the most precious little people in the world to me.

Happy Mothers Day

to all you mothers out there,

whether you are biological, step-mom, your baby is up in heaven with Jesus, 

or if you are one of those amazing women that doesn't have children of their own, 

but you pour into others that need that extra hand to hold.

 May you be blessed not just today

but every day of the year.

Sunday Mornings

I have been struggling.

Struggling every Sunday morning lately.

Sundays are supposed to be a day to worship God as a body of Christ.

To come together and enjoy the fellowship of one another.

To learn.

It is a day to lift our praise to God

and be able to surround yourself with fellow believers while doing so.

But lately,

I have been struggling.

I wake up Sunday morning and I don't want to go to church.

I actually dread it.

With Luke's job, 

he is gone a lot of Sunday mornings before the girls and I wake up.

I scramble to get them ready on my own.

Then I scramble to do whatever I can to get myself ready

and off we go.

Stressed.

Crying.

Angry.

I get to church and it's chaos.

We try to find a seat, try to keep the girls entertained.

They get antsy so off we go to the nursery.

Pea is going through a phase where she hates the nursery

unless you are in there with her.

She refuses to go to the 2 year old classroom,

but refuses to stay in the nursery on her own.

So, 

I spend the entire service sitting in the nursery.

Annoyed.

Frustrated.

Angry.

It's the same thing.

Sunday after Sunday.

The odd Sunday Luke will not be helping out with anything so he can help me out.

Take them himself and let me sit in on the service.

 It just makes me wonder,

why do I bother?

Why do I get up, scramble around frantically to get all of us ready?

To sit in the nursery all morning!

It would be different if I could hear the music and the message in the nursery.

Maybe feel like I am a part of the service

even though I am not.

If they had a little screen that let me feel like I was able to worship too.

But instead,

I am secluded to a play area that is a little more glorified than my living room,

to sit and watch my children play.

I can do that in the comfort of my own home.

While we are in pj's and where I can enjoy a worship service played on my computer.

I am struggling with this question:

 Why do I go to church Sunday morning?

I have talked to some other moms

and they feel the same way.

But how can we make the church see this?

How can we make them understand that life is already hard for a mom

and on Sunday mornings, we still want to feel like we belong at church.

We still want to feel like we are a part of the body of Christ.

Not put into a room

to be secluded from the rest.

Maybe

this is just me.

Maybe

I am just ranting.

But

This is how I am feeling lately.

And I am having a very hard time persuading myself to get up Sunday morning to go to church.

Do you feel this way too?
I would love to hear the opinion of other moms out there!

Best Friends Ever

We got a call sunday afternoon

from our friends

TeKapua & Lindsay.

They said they wanted to do something for us

because we have had a long week and a long couple months.

all we had to do was find a babysitter for monday,

they were going to take us out.

 We scrambled around to find a babysitter.

Well no. That is an exaggeration!

We just had to post it on facebook and we got some hits instantly.

I mean,

who wouldn't want to take care of 2 adorable little girls.

or so I think.

So monday morning came around.

TK & Linds showed up at our house 

and made french toast and bacon for us!

Our wonderful babysitters

Ainslee &Alana

came by just before 11am and we were off.

They took us to Le Nordik for an afternoon of relaxation.

and then we went to this delicious mexican place

just downtown Ottawa called

"Ahora"

SOOOO GOOD!!!

We are so blessed to have this couple in our lives.

There are very few people that you can be real and honest

and talk about anything with.

These two,

we've passed the barriers.

There are no walls.

We can be ourselves with no reserve.

We are so thankful that God placed them in our lives

and we look forward to many, many, many years to come with them!

We are blessed to have such amazing friends!

Thank you so much for your kindness 

and thoughtfulness!

We LOVE you both so much!